“Sometimes we need to stop analyzing the past, stop planning the future, stop figuring out precisely how we feel, stop deciding exactly what we want, and just see what happens.”

Sex and the City, you're just too dang good. Do you ever come across quotes that do nothing other than inspire you? So many quotes that I read or hear have some way of coming into my life and inspiring me in one way or another. Based on my love for Sex and the City, I've heard this one a time or two before, but came across it once again tonight. At the perfect time. 

“Sometimes we need to stop analyzing the past, stop planning the future, stop figuring out precisely how we feel, stop deciding exactly what we want, and just see what happens.” - Sex and the City.

This quote couldn't be any more motivating at a time like this. After so much time spent knowing just what I want to do when I "grow up"...then not totally knowing...but then totally knowing...I've come to a point where I'm not sure whether I do know or not!? This past year, especially, has been weird for me. It hasn't been bad, just weird. Different. Lots of obstacles to face along the way, and I do like obstacles, but I think it comes to a point where one can only take so much, and then she just needs to stop to look around, and maybe even say no every once in a while. 

Just like the quote reads, sometimes we need to stop analyzing the past. What has happened in the past has happened, whether it be good or bad or something ultimately life changing, but there is nothing that we can do to change the past so we need to find a way to live with what the past has given us, and move on into the future. After all, I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason, and even if we've made mistakes along the way, we take something and learn something from them to further help us in the future and lead us to where we want and/or need to be. 

We need to stop planning the future. This is hard for me. I have a hard time living day to day (heck, even hour to hour!) without having some sort of a plan. I need to learn, and am working at this, that sometimes it is alright to go with the flow and not have every second of every day of my life planned out. Based on what happens in my life each day, I suddenly plot out a whole new plan for my future and where I will be in how many years, etc. I have no idea where my life will lead me 6 months from now. How am I supposed to plan for that!? I of course want to have goals for my future, but to have it planned out to a tee (I'm talking where I live, where I work and in what position, being in another city, how soon kids will come...etc.) is probably something that I need to take day by day. What's meant to happen will happen, and it will be right for me, and if it's not, I'll figure out how to make it that way. (Side note...One thing I DO indeed know for sure, though, is that I will be married to the man of my dreams in less than NINE months!! :) ) 

Stop figuring out precisely how we feel. This is another tough one because lately I can't seem to figure out how I feel about a lot of things, especially with so many big life changes that have happened in the past year, all of which are beyond exciting, but it's still a lot to take in so fast! (No worries though, I know if there is one thing I do feel it is definitely EXCITED!!...Just trying to figure out all of the other emotions in the meantime! : ) ) 

Stop deciding exactly what we want. Again, I don't know what exactly I want anymore. Like I said, I tend to always think I have my whole life planned out, and I know exactly what I want and what I will have, but the way that things can change so quickly makes my opinion change on that as well. I honestly don't know exactly what I want with my life, like I thought I did, and for now, I'm just going to keep it that way. While I do what I can to figure out just what that may be, in the meantime, I'm just going to stick with not knowing for a while. Another new one for me, but for today, I don't think I really mind it all too much. I do know that ultimately I would love love LOVE to have my own event planning company, but that will take time, and lots of experience...so that leads me back to figuring things out along the way. (I also want to write a book! So that's two things right there I suppose :) ) 

And just see what happens. Here's where I just let life take hold of me and lead me in the direction I am supposed to be going. I'm going to try to not have a solid plan for once in my life and wait things out [for possibly the first time ever] and just see where life may lead. It's going to definitely take some time, and I of course know that I will not be able to say no to planning and deciding and analyzing for very long (It's in my nature...I can't just completely kick it to the curb ; )  ), but for today, it seems to be the best solution, and I think it will help lead me somewhere, wherever that may be. Oh the simple joys of [POSTGRAD] life, huh!? No one said it would be easy, that's for sure, but in the end, it will all be worth it. Life's a journey. Along the way, I'm going to just keep on living. And watching Sex and the City of course : ) 

If you don't like something, change it, and if you can't change it, change your attitude about it

I've been joking around an awful lot lately saying that I'll take my SEMO ADPi life back right about now...but a part of me is dying to be back there just for a little bit longer. I've waited and waited for graduation and being "grown up" and I really do love this exciting next step in my life, but I wish I had more time for FUN like I did in college! As I always mention, I am of course beyond excited for every step of the way getting to where I want to be in my life...but dang it sure is tough! No one said it would be easy, but my goodness. The grass certainly is not always greener on the other side that's for sure. The new job has been going well just a bit stressful at times, but that's too be expected. I am still open to any and all potential opportunities that I may come across along the way that will help lead me to where I really want to be. I've taken on so many new and big and important responsibilities since I graduated in May, and I think that they still have not all yet set in completely. It was a huge adjustment for me once everyone started heading back to school for the semester...and this time I just wasn't going. Instead of moving back into the ADPi house and preparing for recruitment I was starting my first full time job. While all of my friends and sorority sisters were worrying about what new girls were going to become members of ADPi, I was worrying about my first day of my new job, the new staff that I manage, benefits...stuff that I always heard my parents talking about...and from time to time thought about, but didn't realize how soon such things  would come. It seems like everyone always says this, but my biggest wish for each of you is to live each day and to live in the moment. I try so hard to do this myself, but sometimes it truly is so much harder than it seems, always wishing for something else, something more, something better. Especially to those of you in your senior year of college, make it your absolute best. I know I spent so much time focusing on job searching and getting things figured out my senior year, and I am glad I did, but I do certainly wish I could and would have spent more time realizing the fact that that was it. Now when I go back to SEMO for visits it will only be distant memories. It will be fun, but it won't be the same. But I will say right about now that a trip back to Cape is MUCH in need. I have not been back since the day after I graduated in May. That means I haven't been back in four months. That's the longest time I've gone without being in that town (despite my love/hate relationship with the town) in the past five years (aside from our drive through on the way to and from Memphis earlier this Summer). I am SO hoping that my job will allow me to go to Cape for Homecoming! College was a big part of my life, and it's a big part for many. I think that's one experience I will certainly never forget. I've experienced so many life changes in the past year, and I'm still trying hard to take everything in and figure everything out! I really love it when I stumble across good, inspirational quotes. I came across another one of my favorites today..."If you don't like something, change it, and if you can't change it, change your attitude about it." Something's gotta give here. Not quite sure what, but certainly something. I need to get back to figuring out this thing called life! Good luck to those of you trying to do to nothing other than the same! : )

My passion is people

I am officially about to start week 4 of my new job at the Westin St. Louis which means I am almost one month in! These past few weeks have gone by far faster than expected. I have so much to get used to when it comes to the new job, especially when it comes to the schedule! I work a variety of AM/PM shifts so my schedule varies daily...whether I have to be there by 6 am and am off around 3 pm or I go in around 3 and am off around 11 or midnight. There are advantages and disadvantages to both, but I think I prefer the AM shift (despite the fact that I don't exactly love waking up at 4am) because I like being home around 4 pm and having the rest of the day to get other stuff done. I am more of a morning person than I am a night person. Starting next week I think I will be starting to run my own shifts by myself! I am anxious yet excited about this all at the same time! Lot's of responsibility, but I am ready to take it on! This does mean, though, that I will likely be working a lot more of the pm shifts than the am shifts, but that's ok! I have enjoyed them both thus far...they are just two completely different atmospheres! Along with the crazy flexibility of the schedule, we don't necessarily get weekends off either...so this week for example, I was off yesterday and today...so that's basically my weekend, that of which will also be different each week. It's not a bad thing, just a lot to get used to!! As you all know my hopes are to one day be planning fabulous events (weddings, conventions, philanthropic, galas...all of the above!) so I clearly will be working many nights and weekends when called for which is something that I am expecting and ready to take on, but I do know that I will also have a fairly regular work schedule on top of that, while additionally coming in those nights and weekends for my events as needed. I am planning to continue to do everything in my power to work my way up to that point! I'm not sure how long it will take, but I think it will be worth it. And if I just so happen to find something else along the way that may even take me in a different path, I supposed I may accept that as well. Life is all about options and opportunities and I want nothing other than to experience these. It will certainly be (and already has been much of) a learning process along the way, but I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason and will somehow get me exactly where I wish to be. In the meantime, I plan to continue learning everything I possibly can to help get me there! I always hear that life is a journey...boy is that ever true. I shall continue to live each day for what it's worth! I tend to have a plan for everything in my life...whether it be on a day to day basis or for what I foresee in my future...but I am also beginning to learn that those plans are oftentimes not definite, and something even greater (or maybe not so great) may come up along the way, but, again, it's all a part of the process of getting there. I know what I think I want to be doing, but I may end up somewhere else doing something completely different than expected and loving it, but for now, I will continue with just what I think and hope for my future and see just where that may take me : )